trends i have noticed, but do not understand


1. Cows sitting down.

I helped my younger sister to move some stuff from Rohnert Park yesterday. On my drive up through Marin, I saw many cows, all appearing to kneel or sit in their pastures. The first group was at least a hundred cows, none of which were standing. I thought they were injured at first, but it seemed to be the trend. I noticed at least twice as many sitting/kneeling cows as I did standing bovines.

Why was this? Were the cows sad? Were they hung over from an exhausting New Year's celebration, and random frantic milkings at midnight? Perhaps they were Muslim cows, performing one of their five-times-daily obligations to Mecca. Muslim cows aren't swayed by the desperate, fawning attentions of the Hindus, knowing in their hearts that Pakistan is and will always be the true owner of Khalistan.

All of the lambs I saw were standing, even the babies.

2. Pink Floyd on the radio

Ever since New Year's Eve, Dark Side of the Moon has been on the radio constantly. KFOG played the whole album a few times, "Us and Them" has been in heavy rotation on The Bone, and I've heard "Money" on The Drive. There's a possibility I'm unaware of the local Pink Floyd airplay, since in Berkeley I mostly listen to KALX. But, the Floyd has been so omnipresent that I've been checking to see if there was a recent death in the band or something. Of course, given that I haven't heard The Clash on the radio at all since Joe Strummer passed, that might not have been reason enough anyway.

So, what is it? The album is 30 years old, but it doesn't seem like that's enough reason for the huge airplay it's been getting. If Gene is correct, maybe it's a Mormon conspiracy. All I'm saying is, I don't want to hear any of that Wizard of Oz bullshit, OK?

3. This weird humming noise outside our apartment, not that loud but clearly audible, centered under the stairwell, which kinda goes on and off randomly with no discernible pattern, and kinda freaks me out a little.

It's ghosts. Definitely angry ghosts. Ghosts that are listening to "On the Run," but don't know the words. That's my guess.


Well, I can't comment on the Floyd, or the random noises.... but don't cows lay down or stand based on weather patterns? Am I making that up? Somebody who hasn't grown up in the city their whole life should really be commenting instead. I guess I'm not that helpful afterall. Oh well. =P

It's a widely held superstition that when the cows are sitting, rain is imminent. I found a site that asserts a connection between cows' copious methane production and this age-old wive's tale:

The theory is more Bellvue than it is Berkeley, and yet I have to ask, Sean, was it cloudy on the day of the sitting cows?


speaking of methane production. so there's this frog at my house, (which technically should indicate that it also smells like urine). but anyway, once the frog had a fart stuck in his bum, and he couldn't swim to the bottom of his cage. and he would make the effort and be all strain-y to swim but then have to give up cause his butt just stayed up there floating at the top. it was sad to see him. eventually one day though he must have released the gas because he managed to sink to the bottom again. where he remains to this day.

this story had nothing to do with cows. i apologize.

you need to apologize for that story on so many levels.

what? i do not.

It was indeed cloudy on the day of the sitting cows.

February 2012
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29      

About This Site

Sean Keane on Tumblr

Sean Keane Comedy Dot Com
Short posts, better name-branding

Backup Blog

Friends and Associates

San Francisco Comedy

Fine Sporting Websites

Local Bands


Sean Keane's Internet Famousness

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Sean Keane published on January 4, 2003 9:55 PM.

all is noisy on new year's day was the previous entry in this blog.

ward street d: the evolution is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.

Powered by Movable Type 5.04