How the Presidency of William Henry Harrison Compares With Our Trip to the Russian River



William Henry Harrison was elected president in 1840. Our annual canoe trip to the Russian River is tentatively planned for Sunday, July 30th. Let's see how these two match up!


Canoe trip: At 9 AM, we depart from Safeway, located at Church & Market. Barring attacks from the Shawnee tribe, we should arrive in Guerneville by 10:30. If you don't leave from San Francisco, meet up there at 10:30. We're going with a new company, King's Kayak and Canoe Rentals, and doing the Forestville-to-Guerneville run.
King's is located at 16258 Main Street, in Guerneville. Canoes must be returned by 5:30, so the earlier we arrive, the more precious river time we'll have.

William Henry Harrison Presidency: William Henry Harrison was in office for only thirty days, before dying.


Canoe trip: Historically, canoeists often pick up lunch at Safeway, before we head up north. If you are a member of the Safeway Club, the savings can be significant. Show up at 8:30 or so if you're planning to do some pre-river shopping.

WHHP: Mostly focused on hard cider. Not a Safeway Club member, but WHH was a Freemason.


Canoe trip: Tipping a canoe or kayak will probably will get your stuff wet, which should include water, towels, lunch, and your favorite glass-free river beverage.

WHHP: It's a battle, a nickname, and Tyler, too!

Middle names

Canoe trip: Optional

WHHP: Required

Dealing with the Elements

Canoe trip: Bring sunscreen, river shoes, a swimsuit, a sun-deflecting hat, and a change of clothes.

WHHP: Go to your inauguration in freezing weather without an overcoat, and deliver a two-hour speech, the longest inaugural address in American history. Later, die of pneumonia.


Canoe trip: A two-person canoe rental costs $50 for the day. A two-person kayak is $45. Solo kayaks are $30. Cash only.

WHHP: A failure to enact Henry Clay's proposed "American System", the expulsion of President John Tyler from the Whig Party, sectional conflicts, and the tyrannical reign of evil twin brother Henry William Harrison.


Canoe trip: If you decide to join the canoe fun, let me know ASAP so we can reserve our spots.

WHHP: Before William Henry Harrison died, he laid ill in the White House. Doctors treated him with opium, castor oil, snakes, and various snakeweeds. In other words, Vice President Tyler knew he was a dead man well in advance.

July 30th Itself

Canoe trip: Sun, fun, and friendship.

WHHP: Already dead for nearly four months.

Famous Last Words

Canoe trip: "No thanks. I put on plenty of sunscreen already."

WHHP: "Sir, I wish you to understand the true principles of the government. I wish them carried out. I ask nothing more."


Canoe trip:
2003 -
WHHP: Official White House Biography

Clearly, the canoe trip wins. Feel free to express interest, concerns, and spirited defenses of Daniel Webster in the comments.


Claudine and I rented from King's on Sunday, but we did the trip that started at Guerneville, which came recommended so that we could avoid "that loud, rowdy buch of 150 canoes from Burke's".

The girl in charge of rentals at King's is really cool. Even though they were out of rentals, she rented us her personal kayak and one that belonged to a friend of hers.

The beach in Guerneville sells three kinds of beer (Bud, Coors, and Red Hook) as well as hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken burgers, and (I think) gardenburgers, but the concession shack is strictly BYO Mayonnaise.

kiss ass

I've been to his house in Indiana on vacation and in his defense, the architecture is amazing and the interior decorating is even better. the walls are almost a foot thick to protect against attacks and are all curved decoratively. The doors inside are all pocket doors (retracting into the wall). He also had very pretty wallpaper.

excuse me but i dont appresiat that he was 1 of my family members and i think that that is realy out of order u realy need to stop messin around wid pics of my family and anyone else coz they might come down hard on you

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