get vitamins or die tryin

50 Cent stands to make over $400 million after Coca-Cola bought the company that makes Vitamin Water. Maybe he'll change his name to 40 Billion Cent ha ha topical!

50 Cent might shoot me for making that terrible joke.

I guess he was rich already, but I would really enjoy it if this windfall meant 50 totally dropped his hard-edged persona and basically became Theo Huxtable. Come on, you wouldn't want to hear see him dressed in a Gordon Gartrelle shirt in the video for Justine, Justine!? He could diss Mrs. Griswald, the mean landlady from the Real World Apartments. Or, he could perform a eulogy rap for Lamont, Rudy's old goldfish. I have always thought that, given their inadequate housing and constant proximity to death, goldfish would share a certain life perspective with gangsta rappers, so this could really go places.

theodore2.jpg

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This page contains a single entry by Sean Keane published on May 31, 2007 5:45 PM.

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