hobbit comedy

this is old

Urban Legends of Middle-Earth

* If you play "The Walking Song" by Bilbo Baggins, along with The Wizard of Oz, it totally lines up.

* Aragorn was once relaxing at the Inn of Bree after patrolling the Hinterlands. He began talking to a beautiful half-elven girl at the bar for an hour or so, but she disappeared when he visited the restroom. When he returned, the only thing that remained was a ring of mithril. When he asked Butterbur the barkeep about the girl, he appeared frightened. Visibly quivering, he told Aragorn that the girl had been killed by the Nazgul ten years before.

* Jamie Lee Curtis is a hermaphrodite.

* If you gaze into a palantir, and chant "Bloody Mary" three times, she'll appear. That is, of course, unless the evil eye of the dark lord Sauron manifests itself instead, in which case, you are totally screwed.

* If you eat lembas and drink Coke, your head will explode.

* One time, a guy in New York bought a bunch of baby orcs as pets. When they started to grow up, he freaked out, and flushed them down the toilet. Now there's a race of giant orcs living in the New York City sewers.

* In the movie Three Men and a Baby, you can see the ghost of Gandalf the wizard standing in front of a window. The scene was shot in the same apartment where he battled the Balrog to the death. Some people will tell you it's a cardboard cutout of Ted Danson, but that's just bullshit.

* Hobbits have enormous penises.

* People actually want to read three hundred fucking pages of elf genealogy.

February 2012
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29      

About This Site

Sean Keane on Tumblr

Sean Keane Comedy Dot Com
Short posts, better name-branding

Backup Blog

Friends and Associates

San Francisco Comedy

Fine Sporting Websites

Local Bands


Sean Keane's Internet Famousness

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Sean Keane published on August 28, 2002 11:02 PM.

recommendations, 8/28 was the previous entry in this blog.

got the tickets? is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.

Powered by Movable Type 5.04