jerome bettis: miked up!

ABC fitted Jerome Bettis with a body mike for Super Bowl XL. They played some clips during the game, but obviously censored quite a bit. Zembla is proud to present highlights of the Jerome Bettis "Miked Up" clips ABC wouldn't or couldn't play:

• "I don't care about the Super Bowl MVP award. I just want a ring. Plus, the MVP gets an Escalade, and you know Jerome Bettis don't drive no American car."
• "Ow. Ow. Ow. Damn, I crapped my pants a little bit on that tackle."
• "Willie, I want you to hit that hole, and then just fall down. Lean forward and get the safe two yards. That's Steelers football, baby."
• "FI-RE MIL-LEN! FI-RE MIL-LEN! FI-RE MIL-LEN! FI-RE MIL-LEN!"
• "Honestly, this is the first time I've been to Detroit in eight years. Terrible, depressing city."
• (Singing) "You make a dead man come, yeah, you make a dead man come."
• "Yo soy el autobus, cabron!"
• "No, me and my girlfriend have an open relationship, baby. Both of us see other people. It's cool."
• "Please don't hit me so hard, Mr. Tatupu. (whispered) Please. I'll just fall down. No one will know." (Pause) I'll give you money."
• (Flatulence) I guess The Bus should have made a longer stop in the can during halftime, huh?
• "Oh, that's nothing. Just got a little bit of a stiffy here, Antwaan. Nah, that always happens when Troy makes a tackle. It's cool."
• "Willie, you need some oxygen? Want to borrow my inhaler? How about some Skittles? I got a bag right here in my helmet."
• We gotta pull together here! This win means nothing if we don't cover the spread! Let's get a first down here - for the gamblers!
• "Jerome Bettis, you've just won the Super Bowl? What are you going to do next?"
  "I'm going to...drive across the border to Windsor, to gamble, smoke Cuban cigars, and pick up a busload of whores!"