There's new music from former-roommate and current-expatriate The John Francis. Though he's out of the country, the internet knows no borders, and there are no trade restrictions on musical gold. New downloadloadables are on the front page, along with recommendations for live music, burritos, and sunsets. I like Ballad of the extra-Marital Private Investigator, and not just because it was recorded in my old house. As I post this recommendation, I'm listening to it for the third time in a row, back-to-back-to-back like a Lakers dynasty. The guitarwork is excellent, The John Francis is in fine voice, and I was only mildly disappointed to realize I'd misheard "fallacious" as "fellatious", because "fellatious" is not a word.
To truly appreciate this work, you should picture TJF singing from a church pew, bearded and wearing a knit cap, with an unattended mug of milk boiling over as it sits directly above a gas burner in the kitchen.
I also enjoyed the covers of songs by local acts Last of the Blacksmiths and El Capitan. Check out TJF's take, and check out the original artists if you notice them playing around town.
In The Non-Francis area of local music news, math-metal-dub rockers and one-time Sean Keane stage-sharers We be the Echo are at the Hemlock Tavern this Saturday, at 9:30 in the PM. The show is only $6, and that includes all the peanuts you can eat. Hell, hide some peanuts in your bag, take them home, and then place them all around your apartment, within an arm's length of anywhere you might want to snack while listening to your free TJF downloads. I feel like if he weren't busy in England eating shepherd's pie and kabobs, that's how The John Francis himself would do things.
But more importantly: where's the eggs benedict? I've been searching all over the place! I've tried:
/eggs/
/eggsbenedict/
/eggsbenedicts/
/breakfast/
/food/
/reviews/
Where, god, have all the eggs benedicts gone?
Benedicts aren't on the music site at all.
D'oh!
John Francis: Take me to your benedicts.
Fine form, Zembla. And I read your last several postings with ample hilarity. You've got to get yourself a real website, and a publicist, and a real large audience.
And so as to salve your dissapointment, I will explain your confusion as to the adjective fellatious. The word is indeed invented--the poetic narrative demanded it. If I had contacts at the OED, I'd certainly request canonizing fellatious, I'm sure I'm not the only person who has taken this fellatio-inspired linguistic leap.
The lyrics, for your clarification:
Hiding out to foil cold killing isn't worth twice the pay.
Maker of the mad love breaker calls us the night away because
they got a fellatious silhouette.
Rascal in the moonlit parlor circles and settles in.
Damsel or indecent target -- bothersome just the same.
Can't you see them in fellatious silhouette?
Everywhere a scandal quickens -- man, woman, and child.
Swipe the fog off from these glasses; is it just me or is
that the beat of a fellatious silhouette;
the throb of a fellatious silhouette;
the dance of a fellatious silhouette;
the trance of a fellatious silhouette;
the steam from a fellatious silhoette?
The fiend in the fellatious silhoette!
A dash to the fellatious silhoette!
The flash on the fellatious silhoette!
And Danny, I'm not sure how you expected to find the secrets to eggs benedict via The John Francis. Though I will share a secret recipe to replicating an Orange Julius beverage at home.
6 oz. orange juice concentrate—frozen
1 cup milk
1 cup water
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
10 ice cubes
Place all items in a blender. Cover and blend. After blending is complete, serve immediately, into cups or glasses.
john francis, if you read this again i would like to register my extreme approval for the cornelius album. i thought it would be silly but actually it's lovely and fantastic. three thumbs up. see you in london, red.