what really happened at the end of game 5

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For the second time this series, Stephen Jackson got an early start on his postgame shower. And again, the culprit was ... clapping...The official was standing down near the block, Jackson walked past him clapping, continued walking and continued clapping ... and at the time he got T'd up, he was looking and clapping in the opposite direction of the official.

From MJD at The Fanhouse

What Really Happened at the End of Game 5

(Stephen Jackson walks past Referee Ken Mauer while clapping.)

Referee Ken Mauer: That's a T. You're out of here, Jackson!

Golden State Fan: Let's go Warriors! (Clap-clap Clap-clap-clap) Let's go Warriors! (Clap-clap Clap-clap-clap)

Mauer: You're out of here, too, Golden State Fan!

(Security escorts Golden State Fan out of the arena.)

(Dallas fans applaud the ejection.)

Mauer: What the...I'll clear this whole arena, I swear to God!

Referee Jim Clark: Ken, there's only 8.9 seconds left. Let's just finish this game.

Mauer: I'm not going to tolerate this disrespectful crap!

Referee Bernie Fryer: Come on, game's almost over.

(Officials retire to the locker room.)

Fryer: What a game. I gotta unwind with some TV. I think Friends is on.

Clark: There's a mosquito in here.

(Fryer turns on the television. The Friends theme song plays.)

The Romantics: So no one told you life was gonna be this way (Clap-clap-clap-clap)

Mauer: That's it! You're out of here, Friends! (Mauer lunges for the remote control.)

Fryer: Whoa, Ken, calm down. I'll turn it off. Cuban set up a sound-activated system in here. (Claps off.)

Mauer: Are you disrespecting me, Bernie?!? You're out of here, Fryer!

Fryer: Ken, you can't eject me from the locker room.

Clark: This mosquito is driving me crazy!(Clark squashes the mosquito between his hands) Got him!

Mauer: Jim, you son of a bitch. How can you show me up like that? I thought we were a crew!

(Mauer lunges at Clark, hands grasping for Clark's throat. Fryer breaks up the fight.)

Fryer: What the hell are you doing, Ken? This is crazy behavior!

Mauer (sighs): I'm sorry guys. It's just...the results came back from the free clinic. I'd been getting this burning sensation when I pee. My testicles are painfully swollen. And there's a sporadic discharge from my penis.

Clark: And?

Mauer: It turns out I've got...the clap. And I guess I'm a little sensitive about it.

Clark: Oh, Ken. Why didn't you tell us?

Mauer: I was embarrassed.

Fryer: An STD is nothing to be embarrassed about. It's just part of life on the road. In fact, I applaud you for your honesty.

Clark: Uh-oh.

Mauer: You applaud me? That's it, old man! You're going down!

3 Comments

I want to applaud this entry, but I'm afraid. Can I just do jazz hands instead?

Fryer: Look, man, let's just put on this soothing Disney movie, it'll calm you down.

Mrs. Banks: Take heart from Mrs. Pankhurst, been clapped in irons again!

Mauer: Grrauuuugh!!!

I can always count on you for an impressively obscure "Mary Poppins" quote. Votes for women!

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This page contains a single entry by Sean Keane published on May 3, 2007 2:46 PM.

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